Friday, August 20, 2010

How do Army WAGS cope when their men are at war/excercise?

Im engaged to my fiance who is in the army but he is based in Germany permanantley. I am moving to Germany in October and will marry him in July 2010.

Im also expecting our first baby (due Sept 2010) and finding it so hard without him being around. Normally i can talk to him when he finishes work at night time, but for the next 8 weeks he is on an excercise with no phone and no form of contact. I know he is suffering as bad as i am because when we do speak he is so overwhelmed and upset and misses watching my tummy grow with our first child.

How do i make this easier for both of us? Please can an experienced Army Wife tell me how they have coped over the years with the seperation and risk of danger near them. I am finding it very hard and upsetting. I know he is going to Afghan next year for 6 months also and im dreading the prospect of this.

Thanks xHow do Army WAGS cope when their men are at war/excercise?
I wish I knew what I could say to you, but really, all I can even think is ';Luck you, only six months...'; It's the life of the Army Wife. He's going to be gone a lot and you're going to be on your own a lot. You deal with it by carrying on with your life. My husband is in Iraq right now and I just go on with my life. There's not much else you can do. Being sad gets old. Eventually you have to just settle into a routine. Having your child will make it less lonely and give you a distraction while he's away, but it will be hard for him to miss his child's early years. It will be hard for you knowing he's is missing his child. It will be hard for his child not having Dad around.

You just need to find your support system and hold on to it. Do you have to remain in Germany while he is in Afghanistan? If you can, move to be with your mother or a friend in the States while he is away. A foreign country is not an ideal place when you're alone, unless you can make friends and connections on base, in which case you should be fine. You will figure out how best to deal with this in your own way. My advice is be prepared to move that wedding date. My husband's deployment date shifted up to the day they told him to show up. We ended up waking up one morning and running down to the courthouse just in case.

Good luck to you and your husband.

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